In case you thought Trump was the only diehard blowhard in the country …
This is like an epic high elementary school game of “I know you are, but what am I”? Pharmaceutical phuckwad Martin Shkreli doesn’t seem to realize comedian Patton Oswalt knows how to expertly stir his pot, and pulls the classic chest-puffing move: go after someone else. Only the next guy just happens to spends half his time dressed up as a perennial symbol of good — truth, honor, justice — and the other half, being a regular Mr. Nice Guy, visiting sick kids — basically everything (as demonstrated by his actions), Shkreli isn’t. But blowhards gotta blow … hard, so let’s all pretend to be impressed with Shkreli’s barrage of BS, all generated by a single appreciative Chris Evans tweet:
@ChrisEvans ah another liberal
— Martin Shkreli (@MartinShkreli) September 7, 2016
You may want to grab a snack.
Come to Brooklyn and I’ll introduce you to the real Captain America and a couple of fuckin roundhouses if you say my name again @ChrisEvans
— Martin Shkreli (@MartinShkreli) September 7, 2016
.@ChrisEvans gonna respond with “you’re going to roundhouse those drug prices” or some dumb shit and 1 mil liberals are gonna scream ‘owned’
— Martin Shkreli (@MartinShkreli) September 7, 2016
I have fucking soldiers if u wanna talk shit you have to speak with the rank and file first. Chain-of-command in these streets. Where’s Milo
— Martin Shkreli (@MartinShkreli) September 7, 2016
I’m so fuckin pissed I’m gonna do some Muai Thai
— Martin Shkreli (@MartinShkreli) September 7, 2016
Warning! I’ve been training with nunchucks in case any thats or wannabe superheroes talk reckless.
— Martin Shkreli (@MartinShkreli) September 8, 2016
Through this entire thing, my brain is picturing is Chris Evans’ Captain America with one hand on the top of Shkreli’s head, holding him at arm’s length while the idiot flails and fruitlessly tries to land a punch.
I mean, come on, dude.
Cap knows it’s not even worth wasting his finger muscles to type anything back.
Oswalt kindly acknowledged his support.
Thank you, Captain! https://t.co/lKecDxnZDp
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) September 7, 2016
And that’s it for today’s edition of One-Sided Twitter Feuds!
