It’s over. Take this vile planet and cast her into the sun for no hope and no light remains on her shores.
Stop the clocks. Turn off the ovens. Let your soufflés collapse and your meringue peaks wither. Leave your butter unsoftened and your organic, free-range eggs in their recyclable containers.
Mel & Sue have quit The Great British Bake Off. 
No more gingerbread pubs nor bubblegum-flavoured icing. Never again will we see the glimmer of joy in Mary’s eyes at the promise of boozy rum cake; never again will Paul be quietly impressed by your sourdough bread.
Fie on your eyes! Fie on your homes!
Mel & Sue won’t follow Great British Bake Off to Channel 4. The below statement was released earlier today:
“Follow the dough:” even now, in our darkest of hours, they’re still punning their way into our hearts.
If you want to know: yes, I’m crying real tears right now.
I am crushed. I cannot imagine this was an easy decision for either one of these exemplary and incredible women. While they do do other work that isn’t the Bake Off (and do it very well) no can deny the importance of two of the funniest, coolest women in Great Britain to the best show ever made.
They are the Bake Off. They are the heart of the show. Even if Mary and Paul follow, it doesn’t matter. Without Mel & Sue … what’s even the point?
It’s over. It’s done.
Bake Off is dead.
